Random Things....

Top Five Things That I Dug Last Week.

5) Hugh Jackman’s Oscar opening number.

This was just funny! If you missed it you really need to catch it on Youtube or something. Him singing about how he didn’t see The Reader nearly brought me to tears.

4) Netflix: My new best friend

Rachael and I got a subscription for Christmas and have been using the hell out of it ever since. Last week I watched a forgotten classic: Monster Squad. If you’ve never seen this movie go right now to a place where movies are rented or sold and rent it. Or buy it. If you liked The Goonies this is even better. And if you didn’t like The Goonies….well then I don’t care to know you. Please leave now.

3) Twilight.

Sigh. Yes. I’m reading Twilight. What, you may ask, would make a Football lovin’, UFC watchin’ dude read a tale of teen romance? Quite simply my wife loves it. No, love isn’t right. What’s stronger then love? Who said plastic?!? Get out of here!Anyway, she’s spellbound with the entire world of Teen Vampire love and I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. So I saw the movie and was completely bored. Still, she insisted that the book was much better and I relented. Turns out she was right. (She’s a brilliant lady so that happens a lot.) The characters are surprisingly believable and the story moves at an entertaining pace. Still, there are waaaaay too many passages about how beautiful Edward is. I get it. He’s a good looking cat. Let’s move on.

2) Random Free Channels on my HD TV.

For some reason my HD TV picks up odd ball channels. Over the weekend I was treated to The Dark Knight, There Will Be Blood, and bad 80s porn. There appears to be no rhyme or reason for where these shows come from. Channels will disappear after each movie and, sometimes, the programs are fast forwarded. The bad porn for example. The dialogue scenes were mostly fast forwarded to get to the nastiness. I’m starting to think I’m picking up some creepy neighbors satellite signal. Weird. But highly entertaining. If anyone knows about this phenomena please let me know.

1) Free Whoppers!

I bought one of those “Support a School” coupon book thingies at Burger King and have been livin’ the fatty lifestyle ever since. Why have one Whopper when you can clog your arteries with two for the same price! Heh. See, this is why other countries hate us. I’m convinced the Russians secretly took control of the fast food industry in the mid-80s and are slowly killing us Capitalist pigs with delicious fried cheese. Commie bastards.


Now, for the sake of balance, here are a couple of things the pissed me off last week.

2) They’re making a Spider-Man musical.

This hurts me deep inside. While my love of Spidey is unwavering I have no desire to see this future train wreck.
A dance number with the Daily Bugle Bullpen.
A tearful solo from Mary Jane.
Aunt May singin’ about wheat cakes.

Shudder.
I’ll pass thanks. Though, whomever plays Peter Parker will have to be better than that android they call Tobey.

1) Ann Hathaway needs a sandwich.

I like me some Ann Hathaway. But good lord she’s skinny. Perhaps I’ll use one of my Burger King coupons and send her a double cheese burger.

---BJS